Laura Flook

Also Arriving This June...

New Logo Tees and Canvas Bags will be available towards the end of June.. and so will:


Jabot & Bow Collar

***HOWEVER, due to an unforeseeable natural disaster that took place in North India, while my pattern-maker was there visiting family (a tragedy that has left nearly 6,000 people 'presumed dead' ), I am behind in production. I cannot say at this time, exactly when the Jabot & Bow Collar will be made available and I'm hoping anyone interested will forgive the postponement, given the nature of the situation.****

The Above Image - As Well As That Featured on the Home Page of my Website -

 Photographed by: Elizabeth Waugh

I WAS Awfully Pleased to Announce that....

 Dresses, Coats and Other Apparel of my design will Once Again (Sometime this June, to be a little more Specific) start to become available for purchase at www.lauraflook.com…

***HOWEVER, due to an unforeseeable natural disaster that took place in North India, while my pattern-maker was there visiting family (a tragedy that has left nearly 6,000 people 'presumed dead' ), I am behind in production. I cannot say at this time, exactly when aforementioned items will be made available and I'm hoping anyone interested will forgive the postponement, given the nature of the situation. I am sorry.****

Amongst the First in Attire to be Made Procurable, will be THE DRESS I'm wearing in the following photographs (not yet named and apologetically obscured in these images, which were not intended to feature the dress on its own. Photos of the isolated dress to come..)

    

AND FOR THE FALL...

 

The Above Images~ As Seen in the Odd Folks Home November 22nd, 2012 Premiere on Discovery's SCIENCE Channel~

Photography: Sergio Royzen 

Hair: Alberto Vasquez

Makeup: Rose Devitt

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Regretful News & a Adorable Photo of my Dog to Counteract Said News

 

I'm afraid I had to increase the price from $13 to $17 for the Expiration Date comic book..  I'm sorry.
The tedious preparation of each comic, toe tag and parcel is taking up a great deal of my time - preventing me from working on other things I fancy that more effectively support my geriatric Black Labrador Retriever's living and medical expenses~ as well as my own.. I honestly did not expect more than a few orders a week (it was supposed to be a "Side" project) - as it is now, the comics are occupying most of my time.. and in the end, it doesn't really amount to much in the form of compensation for both materials And my time. The $4 hike is not going to solve the economic injustice that I (and so many of us enjoy). However, i AM hoping that the price increase will reduce the amount of orders I get (Fantastic business idea, right? ha!), to loosen up more of my time, so I can pursue more sartorial projects I've unfortunately had to put on hold. 
Serious suggestions of how to increase the amount of hours in the day are 'welcome' (though not particularly encouraged..as chances are, I've already thought of / considered / tried to apply it and there's a reason it's not working. (Probably something to do with SCiENce and shit). .At Any rate, Please forgive me.

<---here's the photo of comfort i promised you


p.s... i realize the caption on Trocar's photo includes the word "helper", but seriously.. she does fuck all 'round here in terms of manual labor.

Meat-cleaved Spatter & Jelly.....

"Jelly" ~ Sculpted in Oil-Based Clay and Cast in Plastic from a Silicone MOld by Reporter/Comic Strip Artist, Jarod Roberts ~

I received this fantastic gift in the mail, from a customer who apparently enjoyed reading his copy of Expiration Date..

 I was beyond impressed..astounded, really (and simultaneously relieved (though considerably more astounded  as my initial thoughts, after beginning to open this package, included a few of the following:

" i REALLy, REALLy HATE PEANut foam"

"Why is the INside box so Freakishly cold?"

"And Why do the contents of this box shift from side to side in a "meaty" sort of way??"

"This feels more like ROADKiLL than a model car"

"I best put on some gloves"....


So the suspected automobile fatality turned out to be the above sculpture of my beloved Expiration Date character, "Jelly Klott".. i'm still in awe..This was sent to me a few weeks ago, and I contacted Jarod with this e-mail:

Subject: ho

ly meat cleaver in a mortician's hand, batman!

i have so much to say. aside from "that's fucking incredible" unfortunately, my brain power is petering out, due to overexerting myself speaking to someone kid of annoying on thursday..yes.. i'm just going to blame them. has nothing to do with this med change.... thus my delay in sending you an "I received your ridiculously mind-blowing creation in the mail. THANK YOU". e-mail. i took a slew of photos with my good camera.. need to sort through. am going to write a blogshite entry all about it.. i'm just beside myself. that was a dreadfully thoughtful surprise. and to respond to your message. i would love to write another expiration date. issue two is mostly already written from back when issue one was completed. Unfortunately, my artist (and best friend) is way too busy to illustrate any more comic books. He has...a .. BABY now.. (a living one. gross. so on top of working round the clock and being a father, he doesnt' really have the time to do things like sleep and illustrate my every fancy... and i don't know anyone whose artwork compares to his..(until NOW.. you don't happen to draw comic books, do you? :) Seriously, you have jelly down to a frightening likeness. if you are ever interested in taking over illustrations for expiration Date,  let's definitely talk. I sent text photos of your Jelly to Brian and he was just.. well.. here, i'll copy down the texts he replied to the photos i sent him with my "Fuck. Wow. This just arrived via UPS" message and photos.
Brian Text 1: "Holy. Shit."
Brian Text 2 (sent immediately after text 1) "I'm Speechless right now."
Brian Text 3 (sent shortly after text 2 .. he was probably taking a moment to wipe the tears from his eyes and drool from his mouth) "That is absolutely amazing.". 


thank you so much Jarod. Please write me back and tell me about how you just happened to end up a phenomenal modeler ??

I can't say thank you enough, without it beginning to sound insincere,..so i'll just try once more: THANK YOU.

--------

((Jarod replied to my e-mail and has expressed definite interest in continuing Brian's 'good work'. ..so perhaps there will be an Issue #2 of "ExpiratioN Date" after all.... 




i call this one "Trocar with her Bear ..and a sock...on our bed"

 IMAginative, huh? 

i must walk in on her several times an earth's rotation, interrupting her (but not really, as Trocar is rarely bothered) shamelessly practicing her "i-deserve-a-snack-because-i'm-cuter-than-a-rollerSKating-grasshopper" expression. And so the day begins...

This is where the ARTICLE TITLE would be positioned, if i had one

Thanks to the voyeuristic properties of my website hosting service, I've noticed a number of "computer owners" have asked the infallible resource of GOOGLE about my "health". I must say, … i AM touched. And i suppose it's time I talk about my condition, so  anyone else similarly afflicted can rest assured they are NOT ALONE..Yes.laura fLook DOES have an illness. .LIke many others (BILLIONS of others, to be precisely inaccurate) I have been exposed to the spores of Staphylococksuckers Boreus bacterium all my life. And at this stage, while my tolerance and semi-adaptable success for the virus is miraculously high, I do still suffer from frequent bouts of severe Misanthropy..sometimes accompanied by Involuntary Escapism and Depression... Tragically, there is no known (safe OR legal) cure for this ailment. However, a delicate integration of meds, carbs, caffeine, liquorice, fruit flavors and the odd alcoholic beverage keeps my condition in check, as does pet therapy, audio/visual distraction, prudent social interaction and my best efforts towards deliberate avoidance and/or disposal of time-wasting activities/humans (such as  small-talk, dental check-ups, babies, the painfully insincere, social drama, dating, insufficient tippers, people who eat a lot of eggs, humorless rock-star emulators, idea pirates, the needlessly impolite, naysayers, babies, interfering armchair publicists/politicians,ethicists and any moron who claims to be or implies they feel superior than someone else because they are more -(fill in subjective, scientifically unmeasurable term here)- OR -(fill in objectively irrelevant,yet scientifically measurable term here) .. basically any extravagant asshole and preventable unpleasantness in general. so YES. it's been a lifelong struggle, but I've managed to keep my head out of a plastic bag and the heads of others attached to their bodies.... for the result of the latter, YOU, dear compassionate ones- in which GOOGLE you trust-are most fucking welcome.. Here's a picture that reminds me of yet another time waster I manage to avoid...

 

Written by Laura Flook — January 04, 2013

BRINE and HOSES

 Shortly after the collapse of the 20th Century, I was serving part of my NY State Funeral Director/Embalmer's Residency in a Manhattan Funeral Home and we had..i suppose you could call them "permission slips" (for funeral-GUESTS- not Funeral-attractions)...I just came across one within my wHORe's NEST of LOOse papers -which I was sorting through...hunting for my expired passport,because it's not in the toaster-oven where I normally keep it. I know it's utterly useless now (the passport. not the toaster oven)-as is the majority of artifacts I misplace in my personal dwelling - yet that won't restrain me from spontaneous and frantic hour-long attempts throughout the day/week/year to recover said item - because, DESPITE the blunt futility of the search (in most cases)- I have NO ONE to blame and IT SHOULD BE THERE. okay, so... FUNERAL PERMISSION SLIPS! Right.Back in "THE DAY" it seemed an employer would simply TRUST a lad was being genuine when he said "I can't make it into work today..I've got to go bury my Mother'' .. Nowadays (at least in New York City, i take it) you might require the reinforcement of a Xeroxed permission FORm with Funeral Home letterhead, filled out by someone who might be kinda sleepy at the time and trying to keep themselves amused and alert by adding a few extra words to the document of concern...like myself..Without exposing the Funeral Home letterhead and other parlor details (because if they happen to see this, I don't want them to know I wasted a piece of their paper.although technically, it wasn't a waste at all, because i never got rid of it- AND- it's still useful, as it was quite fundamental in making me laugh just a minute ago).  i better go put together more orders, before boring myself to sleep with this 400-word sleeping pill of a blog entry. By the way- ENORMOUS THanks TO EVERYONE who has been spreading the word about (and even more impressively, shopping at) my store! As soon as I transmute into Oprah Winfrey, I will treat you all to i-pads.

-and gjmuller242@aol.com , to answer your questions: 1. I WILL (even though my signature,as surely you must know already- is worth absolutely NOTHING) and 2. YES ! Used to go at least once a year, but it's been a LONG, LONG time. :(


 

The Beginning of the MEND

Welcome to the new (and eventually improved) Laura Flook shop. I apologize for the Godot-like wait - only to display a few products at first. I will spare you the boredom of the particulars - as that will only delay more progress I'd be attempting to explain for lacking. Senseless. This does not mean, however, that I will follow the same logic in the future. I'd REally like to be able to say "I'm a creature of habit"..only because I admire the phrase-HOwever, I've accompanied myself long enough in my life to know, aside from my preference of alcoholic beverage and the frequency with which I purchase paper towels, that despite often making definitive claims about myself and what I like - I always manage to change my mind thirty-frillion times before making a decision, so a good lot of my situational choices are spontaneous. WHat am i writing about? OH YES, the SHOP! Here's the recoup-scoop. 

Now Brace yourselves..

this website is NOT PERFECT.... and nOR AM i. 


As with everything else I attempt, There's always room for improvement.. Given the opportunity, I will rarely consider anything "finished". That said, It's best I just publish the website now and roll with the cataclysm it might end up turning into BEFORE this website is converted into a memorial page where friends and foes alike can leave condolences, brimming with HILARIOUS FUNeral-related puns which no one EVER tires of hearing..like "Killer website, Laura. WAY to Die."  <--priceless

Sooo WELCOME to lauraflook.com. - A 'Perpetual WORK in PROGRESS". New User-Friendly Features, additional F.A.Q., Newsletters and BLOGshite entries will be added nearly daily to this website - as will new merchandise I have for sale - like Hats, Gloves and Scarves - I just need to photograph them and figure out details / pricing, etc.  -*(and Now that I have a professional camera of my own (and some mad-mediocre skills, ..things can move along relatively quickly.  This computer is making me drowsy.

 Before e-mailing me with any questions or concerns, please see the FAQ for additional info


In the MEAN time, feel free to enjoy the crappy photos I took of my closest family member and friend, with whom I relish in a fantastical, completely healthy, unrealistically co-dependent relationship with. 

Taken at Obscura with my tel-o-phone, I managed to capture Trocar ,getting acquainted with her new taxidermied buddy- who we at first called "Agnes Fey".. but after discussing this for a good two minutes, Mary and I decided to keep with the spirit of embalming and corpse preparation, changing the little lamb's legal identity to "Lanolin". More to come. For now, I believe there is a colorful mound of fruity pebbles, soaking in a massive Orange-juice-filled tea cup- with my intentions all over it.


How YOUr PURchase ALso HELps..

At least 5% of All Purchase Proceeds are Annually Donated to The Brain and Behavior Research Foundation. 100% of this donation will be used to fund NARSAD ( National Alliance for Research on Schizophrenia and Depression) Grants that Focus on Research and Development into the Prevention and Treatment of Serious Mental Illnesses and Conditions, such as Schizophrenia, Schizoaffective & Bipolar Disorders, Major Depression and Autism.